Just trying something a little different here. Nothing very profound; just an exercise in rhyme and meter. Comments and criticism always welcome.
Summer danced in gladdened fields,
A maiden fair,
With auburn hair,
Robed in light, the sun to wield
To suit her will. She blessed the land
With raiment green.
A virgin queen
She was. To none she gave her hand.
For she preferred to dance alone
A soaring dove
Of light and love,
Adored by all, but on her own.
Summer’s warmth Lord Winter felt,
A lover ardent,
Bedecked in argent,
With shining diamonds in his belt.
And as he grew to love the maid,
One day he dared,
With heart ensnared,
Before her feet his love he laid.
But none of him would Summer have.
Afar he called
By love enthralled.
To him her heart she never gave.
For love did not within her burn.
Forever free
She wished to be,
With love to give, but not return.
But Summer green would not be swayed.
As he advanced
Away she danced.
Between the two a void she made.
So Winter watched from far away
Sweet Summer’s joy,
The world her toy,
To love and play in as she may.
Aflame with love he duly swore
That Summer bright
And Winter white
Would rule as one forever more.
Blood red rubies in her hair,
And yellow gems
Upon her hems
He gave to Summer for her to wear.
At last she yielded, and thus she found
Her garments bright
Of woven light
At her feet upon the ground.
The light of jewels possessed her mind
The sun she gave
To Winter grave
Earth lost her queen and sadly pined.
She heard the earth forlornly cry.
She shed her jewels,
Their weight now cruel,
And with the Earth lay down to die.
And Winter wept above her bones.
He had to see
That it was he
Who would remain and rule alone.
Stephen P. Smith
I can’t tell the difference between the treasures that come from your mind and ageless and classic poetry books that stand on my shelf at home. Not in regards to lack of originality but in the quality, the depth, the heart.
As always, you are far too kind. But thank you.
For a moment I saw myself back in the ages where people would for entertainment sake sit around a crackling fire place and read each other poetry. Yours would have been a pleasure to read….. I hear the clapping.
Actually, it was probably the sound of me dodging the tomatoes.
Do me a favour, get yourself published so that I can buy a nicely bound (fabric lined if possible) copy to cary around wherever I go!
I’ll have to give that one some thought!
i agree with spasmicallyperfect. please publish so
we can have a copy to read all of your poems anytime
we wish.
ummmm, ok. I’ll give it some thought.
That was great! Hey, I only had to look up argent and Sarabande! Now, write one about the return or rebirth of Summer!
Funny, my wife said the same thing. She was all bummed out about the ending of this poem. I’ll have to give it some thought.
wow, that was so amazing!
you are such a great writer, truly. i am in awe of you.
ohhhh, stop it! You’re making me blush!
Seriously, thank you the kind words. I’m glad you enjoyed it.
Hey Smith,
I happened to remember you posting a poem in here not long ago. I had started to read it, but was pulled away to something else and forgot to finish reading.
I’ve been a member of http://www.writing.com for quite a few years. Reading as much as there is on that site of all skill levels, I have to say, you surpass many of those writers in keeping in tune with the meter, rhyme and timeline. I especially enjoyed the story within your words, which seemed to hit almost a carefree child-like chase to it. Great work and I hope to see more!
Thank you for those kind words!